Lunch--Sushi disaster!

I really love sushi.

This was not sushi.

In fact, it was so unappetizng that I had to throw it out.

Here's the story:

I'm rooting through the cupboards trying to find something I can eat quickly that would be Paleo and also Low-Oxalate. I found a jar of Wasabi Mayonnaise that I had never opened, the ingredients were pretty much ok except that it had soybean oil which is un-Paleo--but I decided to let that slide, and then began to think, what can I make with wasabi mayo? Sushi came to mind of course, and I recalled that I had some nori in the cupboard, and I have canned wild salmon, and cucumber and sweet pepper, and I thought--why not try salmon sushi with no rice?

My first mistake was that I mixed the salmon with the wasabi mayo and minced onion to make a "salmon salad", maybe if I hadn't done that it would have turned out better. My second mistake was that I have no idea how to make sushi, I am an eater of sushi, not a maker of sushi, and I didn't look it up. I'm sure it would have helped if I had drawn on the experience of a sushi chef rather than just fling myself into making it. I put a nice layer of the salmon salad on the nori, then laid out a double layer of sliced cucumber and sliced orange pepper, and rolled it up. It looked ok. It looked something like a sushi roll.

I thought, "Great! I'm really doing this. Good job Sara!" But then I tried to cut it, and it was soggy and didn't cut properly and by the time I got them into some semblance of sushi, I realized that they looked absolutely disgusting. Something about the smell of the salmon salad with the wasabi and the nori really got to me, and after just a couple of bird-like bites I couldn't handle any more. I tried to give it to the cats, but they turned up their nose at it. So I guess Paleo sushi is not a big winner here.